Off To School Stella Goes

It is now definite that Stella will not be returning for a 3rd year of Kindergarten, aka Pre-prep. She is definitely going straight to Prep. Other than her mum, no one (me included) ever expected Stella to stay for another year. She is absolutely more than ready despite her age. Born in April and being the youngest in her group, her mum was worried that she might not be able to cope socially by going to primary school next year. In recent years, I saw quite a few parents of children born between late December and late April freaking out and surrendering their child for an extra year at Kindergarten. As her nanny, I have not seen Stella struggling socially. What does a nanny know? Okay, her teachers reported that she fitted in very well in her group as well. Both her mum and I have been told by the teachers that Stella is a natural leader, capable of initiating group play and contributing ideas for group projects. She can focus for long periods when working independently and loves the company of others as well. Unlike Alexandra (a girl I used to look after), the teachers are not requesting Stella stay for another year, but they will support her mum’s choice if she insists.

No concrete decisions were made as to what will happen to Stella next year until recently. After the first week of returning to Term 4, her mum finally decided that Stella was definitely going to primary school next year. Stella is way ahead of her peers academically. To hold her back so that she can work on her phantom social problems is likely to also hold her back on things that she is extremely good at. Stella’s dad is not confident that the Kindergarten can offer a tailored programme to suit just Stella. He thinks that since she is already so far ahead of her peers now, the gap would be even wider next year. He told me the other day that Stella can’t possibly be the youngest child in Victoria to enter Prep. I reassured him by telling him of a boy (who is now a teenager) that I used to babysit occasionally. The boy’s birthday was right on the cut-off date. I don’t think he displayed Stella’s maturity at around that age. In fact, he was quite shy. Today, he is a confident guy doing well academically as well as in swimming and cricket.

Now that they have made the decision to move forward, they are looking at the list of schools that have offered their daughter a spot again. Stella has been going through the enrolment merry-go-round since she was barely one. Enrolling for the Kindergarten was easy because her parents only tried 3 facilities. Enrolling for primary school was a whole different ball game because they were keen to get her into popular schools that they believe will cater to her needs. For some schools Stella didn’t even get to the interview stage. Her name was placed on the waiting lists instead. For the schools that they successfully gained a spot, her parents have responded to a handful. They accepted before making their final decision. LOL. Their favourite is a famous girls’ school in Melbourne. If she goes there next year, Stella will be there till she finishes Year 12. Apparently, 2 other girls from Stella’s group are also heading to that school next year. Her parents are keen to place her in the boarding facilities from Year 7 so Stella can mingle with her peers on weekdays. Two of the other four schools offer an alternative education that appeal to Stella’s mum but her dad is not very keen. The last two options are also traditional private schools but they are located further away. One of these two is slightly alternative and both offer education up to Yr 12 but only one offers boarding facilities for older children.

Stella has since been told that she is going to primary school next year. On hearing the news, Stella couldn’t stop asking questions. She wants to go right away. She wants to visit. The majority of the children in her group at Kindergarten are going to two private schools nearby. Two trips have been organised for the children to visit the two schools. Stella already knew that she was going to neither of them and requested for a similar visit to ‘her’ school. The thing is that her parents have not made a final decision on which school as yet. I told her to enjoy visiting those schools. I asked her to check out the classroom and tell me about the teacher. Later, if her parents take her to visit the school they have chosen, I will ask her to see if the classrooms are similar to the ones she saw when she visited the other schools. I am pretty sure that her parents will have to decide on a school very soon. There are usually things to be done to prepare the little rookies and their parents for the first day of school life.

Sometimes parents choose to hold their children back for reasons that I do not agree. I have heard that boys have been held back because of their size. There is this ‘better be a bully than to be bullied’ mentality. If children are held back for an extra year, they will then be among the ‘oldest’ bunch in the playground when they enter Prep. The chance to be selected for sports like footy is also greatly enhanced for these boys in later years. However, I believe that this move may back fire later on because being older means that many issues that usually arise between Yr 7 and Yr 9 may be brought forward into the final year of primary school. I am not entirely against the idea because for some children, the option to delay is absolutely essential but decisions should not be made without careful considerations. Zoom out a little and look at the bigger picture. Avoid focussing on just the age of entry. Think also about the other end and the stages in the middle.

Note: At the time of posting this, Stella’s parents have finally picked a school. To protect the family’s privacy, the school’s identity will not be revealed here on this blog. It will be known simply as Stella’s school.