Napping Everywhere

I am going to a baby shower next weekend. My friend Bonnie is about to have a baby. I have been told that she is due sometime towards the end of November. We have been warned (jokingly) not to make her laugh too much on the day for fear that her baby might want to join in the celebrations too.

Bonnie showed me the two sheepskins and a crib-size mattress she bought a couple of weeks ago. Although they have bought a cot, Bonnie would like to try practising what our friend in Japan did. Our friend used to live in a cramped apartment when their little boy was born. As described earlier in another post, they sleep on traditional Japanese futons that are stored away during the day. Their little boy sleeps that way too. Our friend used to leave his futon or mattress out in the day so he could sleep when he wished to. The family then moved to a 2 storey small house and the little tot acquired his first bedroom. Our friend continued to place a small futon downstairs in the living area to save them from climbing up the steep stairs each afternoon. When not in use, the futon was folded and kept in the cupboard under the stairs. Our friend wanted to maintain a close bond with her son. She felt that he was content as a baby because he was placed close to everyone in the house. From where the baby laid, he was able to observe all the action going on in the room. When he started to be more mobile, he also began to exhibit independence by settling himself. Our friend would continue with her chores while he napped nearby.

Bonnie is planning to do the same. She too would like to have a closer bond to her baby. She plans for her baby to nap nearby in the day and uses the cot only at night. Along with the investment of a brand new Mountain Buggy, she also bought a matching carry cot. She is planning to use the carry cot for her baby’s day naps in the first few weeks before gradually easing the growing baby to either the sheepskin or crib mattress. She has already made a few covers for the crib mattress. She too thinks that her baby will benefit from napping where everyone will be. She doesn’t think that her baby will be bothered by everyday sounds within a family home.

I am one of those who subscribes to the idea that a baby must sleep in peace, tucked away in his or her cot, in a bedroom far away from the rest of the family. I prefer baby rooms that are situated further away from the rooms where the rest of us congregate. This means that I have to rely on baby monitors especially if the baby has a sibling or more under my care because I can’t just check on the baby quietly without someone following me from behind and makes sudden loud noises. (LOL) I truly believe that a baby is less fussy if he or she has a good rest. Sleep is essential to give the body a chance to rest. It is also during sleep that the baby’s mind works to process all of the experiences the baby has had when he was awake.

I actually quite like the idea of having a baby nap nearby like what my friend did in Japan and what Bonnie is intending to do. I see the need to develop a close bond and how this type of sleeping arrangement might further enhance that. I also see how it will allow the child more freedom of movement without being trapped behind bars. However, I find it hard to leave a child sleeping on the floor, separated only by a thin mattress or sheepskin. I can see myself giving it a go when I visit Japan but I can’t see myself sleeping like that permanently. I am just not sure about sleeping so close to surfaces like carpets. I guess I am bothered by the close proximity to dust and everyday dirt. It doesn’t matter if the ground covers are floorboards, carpets or tatami mats, they must be kept meticulously clean if anyone is going to nap on it. This is less of a problem if a baby is sleeping in a cage, aka a cot that is usually raised above the grounds. I think my repulsion from dirt came from witnessing and implementing sleeping arrangements for children in day care centres all those years ago. Children slept on mattresses on the floors in the same room where they had played and eaten earlier. Because the transition process from lunch to nap time is highly hectic, sometimes the floors were not cleaned properly before mattresses were placed according to a set floor plan for the children to nap on. I have seen children napping next to their shoes or next to bits of food from lunch and sand or dirt from outside. Most of these places did not encourage children to wear slippers or socks indoors and the shoes that they arrived in outdoors. As a result, children playing outside before lunch time brought in extra dirt when they came in for lunch. I do not blame the carers for being lazy because the floors were not cleaned properly. There is only so much that two carers can do. Some carers were lucky because their centres hired extra staff for the busy transition period. I must also add that not all centres use only mattresses (with sheets, pillows and small doonas). Some centres use little stretchers.

Back to the idea of napping around the house on sheepskin or crib size mattress, I definitely will not recommend this idea to any families that I work for. As a nanny, I am not confident enough to recommend anything remotely alternative. I would rather stick to what is recommended as common practice in the mainstream. It is always the nanny’s fault if anything goes wrong. It is better to be safe than sorry. As to whether I will implement this technique when I have my own child, I think I will continue to observe Bonnie for now. I may consider it if it works out for her.

Note: Readers who are considering alternative parenting should do further research. Please do not rely on what I have written as gospel.