I Love Being a Nanny

Spurred on by a few insensitive comments made by someone I barely knew, I decided to write this piece to broadcast to the world my passion in working with little children. Let me just remind the world one more time that being a nanny is not just about changing nappies. There is more to it. I love being a nanny, caring for little children in the security of their own homes. In my opinion, little children should ideally grow up in a small family setting until they are at least 3 or 4 before they are gradually introduced to regular organized programmes in the wider community. Ideally, children should also be cared for by their own parents but sometimes this is not possible if they both work or are operating some kind of business. The parents I work for can afford nannies and they prefer to have one other regular carer looking after their child or children in the comfort of their own homes. Little children are better cared for by a few regular carers (e.g. parents + nanny) as this will help them to establish strong bonds and trust. Babies and toddlers are very generous, loving little beings. If encouraged, they love their nannies just as much as their other primary caregivers (e.g. parents).

Before reading the next part, I just would like to remind everyone that I am aware that most people can’t afford to hire a nanny and there are people out there who are strongly against the idea of having a ‘stranger’ looking after their own precious little ones in the family home.

Sometimes, people argue that it is important to drop their children off at a day care centre for socialization purposes. In my experience, I find that the socialization aspects of my charges are not compromised just because they spend most of the weekdays with me. They do play with other children in the park and on days spent with their parents when I am not there, my charges do play with the children of family friends. Most have some kind of regular get togethers with other children. My current charges are single children without siblings and yet both Bree and Stella are sociable little beings. Each child has a strong natural bond with her parents and bonding with their nanny is just a natural extension of the same process. The parents and I work together to foster good self-esteem and independence in the girls to prepare them for when they join other children in the outside world. Already we are seeing how Stella is not easily swayed by the opinions of her new friends at the primary school. Interacting with people of different ages (e.g. me, siblings and other people) is a form of communication that I strongly encourage all of my charges to do. (How often do we see a work environment where everyone is of the same age?) Such experiences will give children a feel of what is comfortable and what is not while still being supervised. Imagining young children being cared for long hours in a large noisy setting where everyone, except the carers, is of similar age group is nightmarish to me. They deserve to spend at least a few of their early years discovering themselves, connecting with their home environment and practising social interactions in small ‘controlled’ doses. Children who are too young or not yet ready to handle such situations are not only immersed in chaos each day but are also likely to become preoccupied with conforming to gain peer acceptance or become easily confused by conflicting values. Again I must stress that I am aware that not everyone can afford a nanny. Parents have to make the most out of the options available to them.

One of the insensitive comments I received compared a nanny like me to servants working in neighbouring countries. I find that very hurtful considering that it came from someone I barely knew. This was not a comment left in my blog. The person was a friend of a neighbour. She knew very little about what my work entails. She definitely wouldn’t have a clue of what I offer my charges. I do not just mind them, feed them and keep them clean and out of trouble until the parents come home. That is easy work but I do more to teach my little charges, helping them to become independent individuals. For instance, instead of serving them like they are totally helpless, I observe and provide developmentally appropriate opportunities for them to learn to help themselves. Let me tell you that teaching a little tot how to prepare her own jam penny involves more work and preparation than just shoving a ready made one in front of the child during snack time. Despite the extra work, I absolutely enjoy teaching children little things like this. It is such a delightful sight to see a happy child beaming with pride because she learned to make her own simple snack and made more to share with me or with her parents. I wouldn’t have done it for so long if I didn’t enjoy what I am doing. I can honestly declare to the world that my current position is not a form of modern day slavery. Mind you, there are parents out there who are capable of turning a job like mine into hell simply because they are in the position of hiring a nanny. It is the parents, not the children that are usually the troublemakers and I have seen quite a few ugly parents.

I have learned a lot from being a nanny. One day, all the hands on experiences of dealing with little children will no doubt become handy when I am blessed with my own little ones. As for the ugly parenting that I have witnessed, I am adamant to never apply them to anyone’s children, let alone mine. Despite my enjoyment, my career as a nanny will not go on forever. The biological clock is ticking louder than ever. Hopefully my side project will take flight making it possible for a smooth transition to a new career in the near future. The road ahead is likely to be bumpy but we are becoming readier than ever to take on this next adventure that we have been working on for so long. Meanwhile I will just enjoy the rest of my time playing nanny to Stella and Bree.

I apologise to those of you who find this post long and too full of rants. I just need to get it off my chest. I do not wish to offend parents of children in day care centres or child care workers out there but those are my opinions and everyone is entitled to have their own. If you disagree with my views then let’s just agree to disagree.